Hello, my name is Sam... Well... It's isn't, but that's the name I'll use on here.
I'm 20 years old, I'm a girl, and that's all I know about me. I don't know who I am, I don't know who I want to be... I do have an idea of what I want, I just don't know how to get it.
I would love to feel like I belong somewhere in this vast world but, until now, I feel like a complete outsider: I don't like mostly anything everyone does, I feel like I don't enjoy anything, I'm not even Awake most of the times. I just want to feel like I belong, I want to feel normal.
I want to be able to spend some time with my friends and actually enjoy it, not waiting for the time to go home already; I want to be able to travel alone, not fearing that I will get sick and that I might die far away from my family; I want to be able to ask for something whenever I need it, instead of having to wait for the whole place to clear out to finally make my request; I want to able to give a presentation without leaving my hands covered with nail marks; I want to be able to try different foods, without the constant worry that I might get food-poisoned; I want to be able to walk freely with my arms set loose, instead of walking rigidly with my hands knotted together, always staring at my feet so I won't trip and make a fool of myself; I want to enjoy my life freely, without tearing up every time I see elderly people because I know I'll never get to grow old as they did; I want to quit thinking that I won't wake up next day.
I do have happy moments in my not so happy life... I just wish Happiness to win over Sadness.
That's why I created this blog. This is the beginning of my self-recovery from Depression and Anxiety. I am willing to beat their arses, and I'm willing to become the happy person I so much want to be.
You're welcome to join me in this Journey, and I hope we could help each other out.
I'm 20 years old, I'm a girl, and that's all I know about me. I don't know who I am, I don't know who I want to be... I do have an idea of what I want, I just don't know how to get it.
I would love to feel like I belong somewhere in this vast world but, until now, I feel like a complete outsider: I don't like mostly anything everyone does, I feel like I don't enjoy anything, I'm not even Awake most of the times. I just want to feel like I belong, I want to feel normal.
I want to be able to spend some time with my friends and actually enjoy it, not waiting for the time to go home already; I want to be able to travel alone, not fearing that I will get sick and that I might die far away from my family; I want to be able to ask for something whenever I need it, instead of having to wait for the whole place to clear out to finally make my request; I want to able to give a presentation without leaving my hands covered with nail marks; I want to be able to try different foods, without the constant worry that I might get food-poisoned; I want to be able to walk freely with my arms set loose, instead of walking rigidly with my hands knotted together, always staring at my feet so I won't trip and make a fool of myself; I want to enjoy my life freely, without tearing up every time I see elderly people because I know I'll never get to grow old as they did; I want to quit thinking that I won't wake up next day.
I do have happy moments in my not so happy life... I just wish Happiness to win over Sadness.
That's why I created this blog. This is the beginning of my self-recovery from Depression and Anxiety. I am willing to beat their arses, and I'm willing to become the happy person I so much want to be.
You're welcome to join me in this Journey, and I hope we could help each other out.